Category Archives: The object of my obsession

“We are all from the Cosby Show”

I’ve been meaning to write about this since the election. The way people spoke and speak of the First Family like they’re some sort of anomoly. “Black people. Doing well. Going to college?! Well..I NEVER..” But it’s true. We attend private universities, skip our debut into society, we produce lawyers and lobbyists and wear pearls and “act white”. And I’m never sure how to respond to that last one. Yet there are black people that do all of these things and more! It’s crazy! I know! I’ll write more about this later but for now read this from New York Magazine. And really, where will the Obamas ‘summer’:

This is particularly true among parents, who talk about the importance of introducing their children to other black upper-class families so they can know they’re not as peculiar as they might feel. “Black kids need to be around successful black families, because other blacks from humble beginnings want you to apologize for being successful,” says psychiatrist Carlotta Miles. “On the Vineyard, you don’t need excuses or self-consciousness or defensiveness.” Drew Dixon Williams grew up in Washington, D.C., where her mother, Sharon Pratt, served as mayor, and she spent summers on the island. “It’s sort of embarrassing to say this, coming from Washington,” she says, “but I used to say with a straight face—because I was too young to know better—that I would get my black experience on Martha’s Vineyard. I didn’t have to be defensive about not being black enough or being black in the first place. We were all from The Cosby Show.

Also posted in Humdrum | 7 Comments

Stuff. ‘Nuff said.

“Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.”  ~Danny Kaye

Earlier today I became thoroughly and shockingly annoyed over the apathy of others. I demanded response and some sort of commentary to a new Obama administration appointment and instead no one shared the joy, wonder, curiosity and overwhelming amount of giddiness that erupted upon hearing of a thisclose vacancy in the United States House. As much as I dislike apathy towards politics I find my reaction to the apathy a bit deplorable. Who am I to be judgemental and tell people that they should care about Sonia Sotomayor or John McHugh? Why should I be the one to tell others that how a presidential candidate feels about a woman’s right to choose or Plessy v. Ferguson will end up impacting generations? That isn’t my job and yet the way it maddened me today. It was so…well…it was unnecessary. And I totally take back when I said – behind your back – that if Neil Patrick Harris was giving someone a blow job on my bed then you would care more than who Obama was appointing to very high powered positions. I’m sorry.

***

On Sunday evening – pre the day of self righteous bitch ass behavior – I burned three of my fingers on my right hand. I burned them after I put METAL into the microwave so I could make tea because I couldn’t find my normal tea making accouterments. So there I was grabbing hot metal, fleshy fingers first out of the microwave. Good news is that in the event that I commit a serious felony I have no finger prints. Bad news is that I’m using the hunt and peck method when it comes to typing. There’s also a ruined manicure and my father was rather disappointed by my Vulcan salute because my fingers are so effed up that I can’t tell anyone to ‘live long and prosper’ with the proper enthusiasm.

***

I think I’ve spent the last three weeks without telling you that I’ve started writing at MamaPop again. I’m…and I’m loathe to admit this so I’m taking deep breaths but it’s not nearly as bad as Holly crying during Speidi’s wedding so I really shouldn’t care…..I’m doing recaps of The Real Housewives of New Jersey(1, 2, 3). And I fucking love it more than is appropriate. Especially that Caroline. The Carmela Soprano of the group who will fuck a bitch up in a minute.

***

I leave for DC again next week. I’ll have to update my suggestions but that is the least of my worries right now. I keep flipping through my paper planner to July and then I flip back. I then I look at July again and then I flip back. Rinse and repeat. It’s because I need a Klonopin every time I think of July. The running around and the multiple experiences with TSA and how I’m going to pack and the number of tattoos I will be getting and suddenly I’m awake at 2:30AM thinking about standing by myself at BlogHer because EVERYONE HATES ME.

***

Last night I lived my worst fear: I saw my therapist at the bar. I’m not really supposed to be drinking. We pretended not to know each other. Let’s just say I’ll have some ‘splaining to do about that goblet full of (shitty) Meritage.

***

I’m posting now in hopes that tomorrow comes sooner. I’m awaiting a special package at the suggestion of Karen and OMFG I cannot wait to show you guys and also I owe Karen a kiss. And this chick needs some practice like whoa.

Also posted in Oh The Stupidity You'll See, Socially Awkward Barbie™, Strait-jacket | 7 Comments

Quotables

“Collecting quotations is an insidious, even embarrassing habit, like ragpicking or hoarding rocks or trying on other people’s laundry.  I got into it originally while trying to break an addiction to candy.  I kicked candy and now seem to be stuck with quotations, which are attacking my brain instead of my teeth.”  ~Robert Byrne

A few months ago I started writing – by hand – all of my favorite quotes I’ve used in the past 3 1/2 years. ‘Tis true that at times some quotes bear repeating depending on the situation and other times I use a quote just because it makes me think or laugh and the quote is the impetus for the conversation I would like to have. Anyway, when I tried writing the quotes by hand I got a cramp after the third one and I am currently battling an ass-whooping case of insomnia that has me brimming with brilliant ideas after 10 PM.

Every night.

For a week.

A brief digression to say that it is probably due to the general stress and underlying sadness of my life as of late and really it’s nothing a little melatonin can’t cure but still a royal pain in the ass because I keep seeing 2 AM. Spoiler Alert! It’s like getting smacked in the nose with the business end of a pitching wedge.

This evening I decided to use a tumblr site I’ve had for ages to start collecting my absolute favorite quotes already used and ones I will eventually come across and also because I am a quote collector. Some people go for stamps or model trains or beer bottles circa 1956 but I am all about the quotes.

Here’s the site: Hedder I’m Here. I’d explain the title and the tagline but that would just take more time than I have right now because the melatonin! It works! And I’m ready to sleep! So feel free to leave in the comments or email your favorite quotes because seriously, I’m always looking for new ones.

Also posted in If I'm not here... | 24 Comments

The rules of engagement

Now with bonus head-exploding addendum!

“When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it.” ~Clarence Darrow

I’m 24 and I could probably tell the average 34 year old more about politics in 30 minute pedicure session all the while blissfully reading this week’s US Weekly and interjecting with my thoughts on Speidi after flipping each page. I’m not an expert on politics; electoral, congressional, presidential, gubernatorial, none of it, but I feel like I need to say very slowly to some members of our studio audience that there are people – me – who actually go to school to study the science of politics and then they end up with careers in that particular field. There are actual people in the world who discuss politics each and every single day to the point where if they go home and have to read the regurgitated, hyperbolic, misinformed bullshit from people who suddenly decided to pick up the newspaper – apologies, it’s 2008, so by ‘newspaper’ I mean blog – then their heads will explode. Death by Ignorance.

And while I commend people for taking the time to now get informed on issues that others have been engrossed in for decades, I don’t appreciate taking a stance on an issue based on a wikipedia entry or deciding on who to vote for because someone sports the same genitalia that you sport.

Yesterday evening I got angry. Like irate over the presence of a photo on Flickr of a McPalin sign. Which is fine, if you agree with someone on the issues then that is fine but don’t then get huffy and menacing and have your wittle baby feelings hurt when people start to question you or offer dissenting opinions. Especially if your ‘post’ on why you support them leaves much to be desired. And when people voice their valid opinions and ask you WHY then don’t go off and stomp your feet and say that people are so fucking rude. They aren’t being rude they’re asking questions and if you’re going to broadcast your political affiliation then at least be prepared to answer simple god damn questions.

There are bits and pieces to both candidates that are imperfect and their stances are still being worked out. Fuck, Barack Obama once proudly supported school choice and vouchers but at least I am able to wade through his positions and tell you which onces I can wholeheartedly support and which make me feel like he’s raking his nails across a chalkboard just to see me flinch. And so if McPalin is your choice fine, go right on ahead and vote for them, that’s the great thing about Democracy but be able to back up your reasoning and do not, I repeat do not, get offended when someone tries to tell you otherwise. That’s the great thing about America; people are allowed to argue and fight their point until their blue in the face. But you don’t want to look like some dumbshit who just yesterday discovered television.

All of this angry and need to put my foot down came after a post that Stara wrote that was incendiary even if she didn’t mean for it to be as such but was also well thought out and frankly, I was proud of her for putting herself out there. But the comments she received left my mouth gaping and possibly drooling that people would actually use in an argument “Can you please not offend me personally”. I hope that one day Chuck Todd interviews someone and when he presents that person with a truthful and fair argument I hope that the interviewee stops the interview and says “Um, this argument you’re presenting me with offends my delicate sensibilities, could you please stop?” I hope he does stop and then apologizes and then they hold hands and walk off into the sunset.

I’m going to cut and paste exactly what I told Stara and leave you with this so I can go walk around and breathe and appreciate literacy. I wrote this right before the irritation of utter stupidity caused so much pressure in my head that my brain shot out through my eye sockets and left nostril:

I’m just sick of fucking sanctimonious, self-righteous people who suddenly are interested in politics and think that they are brilliant or know what the fuck they’re talking about. Try doing this every god damn day as a fucking career. If any of these people had to do this for a LIVING, they would be curled up in the fetal position whimpering for their mommies because the mean man made them cry because they couldn’t adequately argue their positions and they keep getting hammered on it. I don’t write about politics and it’s my fucking job. You know why? Because I am an expert in one thing: [redacted]. That is all. So I’m not about to argue any position but I do compliment people who write well thought out posts on a subject that they have clearly researched. But don’t come and comment on those posts with some bullshit because it personally offends you. That’s not what politics is about.

Addendum and I swear I’ll be done after this:

So there’s this chick on Flickr who is all Ra-Ra! McPalin. In her description all she says is that she loves them and loves Sarah Palin the end. When people in her comments section ask why she gets all up in arms because OMFG People had the nerve to ask her a question about why she is supporting who she is supporting. And then she got an attitude with me so I copped an attitude right back saying that it kind of comes with the territory: If you post something political people MIGHT ask why you’re supporting who you are supporting. This was her response back to me:

I’m sorry but stating “no one has given any real reason for
why they like her” is ignorant and then asking me why I do
is insulting.  There are many reasons why I and many others
like her and showing my support doesn’t mean I have to make
a list for other people to respect my choice. I and
disagree that it comes w/the territory. It only comes with
it when those types of personality come into play. I figure
that people who like Obama have learned about him and choose
to like him anyway…I dont ask them why. Do I need to past
a test w/everybody to show I have researched her and
therefore am allowed to like her?

Also posted in Poliogue | 39 Comments

A mile high redux


“People are always asking about the good old days. I say, why don’t you say the good now days?” ~Robert M. Young

Surprise!

Contrary to my personal belief; I seem to NOT be a robot. This means that even though my brain is saying, “It would be a brilliant idea to stay up to two am schmoozing and look free beer and look! Pete Wentz” my body is starting to get disgruntle. Denver has just about kicked my ass into the middle of next week and it is only Tuesday. Speaking of Tuesday I had no idea that it was Tuesday until 17 minutes ago. It was a little morning surprise: The days of the week remain in the same order and there are still 24 hours to each one. Amazing.

I’ve been slowly uploading photos from this week to Flickr and upon my return home I’m hoping I’ll be able to absorb and then regurgitate the way in which this week has made me feel. Hopeful doesn’t even begin to describe it. Last night when I walked into the Pepsi Center, I took the escalator up to my seats. I turned around to look at the throngs of people below me and my chest tightened and my heart beat just a little faster. This swelling of emotions coursed through my veins as I realized where I was and why I was here. Politics is a personal thing for me because it is my passion in life. It’s the one thing I love more than writing and to be here and see so many familiar faces (quick digression I have kissed like 89 people on the cheek this week. I will come back with Ebola) and see how far people I’ve known for years have come – to see how far I’ve come – is this high of epic proportions.

It feels good. It feels amazing. For once in my life I’m entirely grateful for a serious ass whooping.

Unity

Also posted in On Happiness | 13 Comments