“I sit and cry,
Just like a child
My pouring tears
Are runnin’ wild”- Ray Charles
To be honest I hate those assholes who do one or all of the following:
A) Say, “I have something awesome to tell you guys but I can’t tell you right now” code for: I’m knocked up or I’m writing a book or both,
B) Say, “I cannot blog anymore because XYZ that you don’t know about are going on and so I can’t” but picture that person doing it with a Scarlet O’hara type look and a hand on their head as they cannot bear to write much more and it must be said as dramatically as possible,
OR
C) Just up and disappear off the face of the earth
My detest comes in the form of an eyeroll and I want to say, “If you don’t want to blog then don’t. I don’t care but don’t make some grand sweeping exit and then return five days later with a story about that funny thing your kid did”. Then again, I can be a supreme asshole. Like vicious.
Today on the way home I knew I wouldn’t be able to physically bring myself to write any words anywhere for quite some time. In fact I’m in tears about it now because it feels as if there is this huge pressure from every inch of my body that is preventing me to do much of anything except to lay here in a pool of snot and tears on my pillow which will now need to be washed because ew; snot and tears.
This is my no means a permanent thing and certainly not limited to leaving you lovely people in the dust while kicking up my heels all the wall and high-fiving passersby as a symbol of my freedom. I just cannot physcially bring myself to write words or … God, go to work. And I never thought I’d be that person so consumed by some fucking illness that I can’t function.
My last attempt at normalcy was dress buying today for an Inauguration cocktail party. I planned out each special ocassion outfit for next week to be a theme, “What’s black and white and hot all over? ME” and now I am ‘meh’ towards anything Obamarama related. Like leaving and doing nothing is fruitless and I cannot count the number of times I’ve referred to myself as irrelevant over the past 72 hours.
There’s this Ray Charles song called Drown in My Own Tears. Every time it comes on the my iPod during a shuffle I skip over it because it’s so sad and melancholoy and really now, what’s depressed and said and crying all over? Well, the answer once again would be ME.
*I had closed the comments because I didn’t want to be THAT girl and all, “Wah, wah, WAHHHH. Overdramatic. Woe! Leave me comments to make me come back!” and then you all would be like, “Ooh, look at me playing the world’s tiniest violin” and it would all just go downhill from there and not make me feel better at all. So there. If I’m going to be an asshole – and if I use that word one more time Melissa will drag her ass up here and bitch slap me – I might as well embrace my full overdramatic assholeness. Right? Right.
28 Comments
Oh “I have something awesome to tell you guys but I can’t tell you right now” this drives me nuts!
I’m sorry … it will pass eventually, and I look forward to reading you when you want to write again. Hang in there! All good thoughts sent your way.
Honey, it’s YOUR writing, you do what YOU feel right doing. If some time off will help you out, you go right ahead and do that. No bitchslapping necessary.
There’s nothing wrong with being overdramatic on occasion. Because you have a vagina it’s your right.
I’m sorry things are tough right now. I know it’s serious if you’re not on an Obama high. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help. I know how you adore a good Republican gay man. I do live in Utah, so I have access to many.
Look, you. I love you. I love your writing. I love YOU. You do do whatever you need to do.
And I’ll handle that tiny little violin for you if you want. I is good at those.
(((BIGFATHUG)))
Do whatever you need to do. I don’t know that much about you but I have enjoyed what I have read here, on Twitter, or wherever. Take care of yourself honey.
You really owe no explanation… write when you’re ready!! xoxox
Dude, whatevs. It’s an ass time of the year. You’ve been feeling like crap. It happens. You do what you need to do to get by. That’s the thing about blogging — when you’re ready, when you’ve got something to say, to share, when you need people, they’re there.
Sending you happier vibes. This too shall pass.
I’ve enjoyed admiring your writing and, really, YOU for the past year. Do whatever you need to do. In the end, taking care of yourself should be top priority. You’ll be missed during your hiatus.
I don’t think you’re an asshole. Why would you be an asshole?
I haven’t blogged consistently in awhile. I’ve been bereft of inspiration, of reason, of whatever…I meet my responsibilities and that’s about it. I keep waiting and praying for it to pass, in fact.
I hope you hit a better stretch soon…pulling for you. You are so talented and so beloved. Wishing you the best, no matter what.
Do what you need to do! I’m pretty sure we’ll all be standing here when you decide to open that door again. Take care of yourself…
As someone who too can not bring herself to write lately (except the twice-weekly MamaPop posts, which are increasingly difficult), I feel you, and will eagerly await both of our returns to the blogosphere.
Big hugs.
If you can’t bring yourself to write any words then I will be all snot and tears. Really.
So just HOW are people “suppposed” to quit blogging? I think we all need to do our own shit on our own terms. Just sayin.
This is just another post about you being YOU. The you we know and love. Do what you need, babe. We love you.
In still other immortal words of Ray Charles…
If your heartaches, seems to hang around, too long…
And your blues, keep getting blue-er, with each song…
Remember, sunshine can be found, behind a cloudy sky…
So let your hair down now, and baby go on and cry.
You do what you gotta do to find the sun again.
Not even a little bitchslapping allowed?
yeah. What the above commentors said.
;P
HB,
Whatever is going on, it too shall pass. It may not feel like it right now but trust me when I say, it will pass. Take whatever time you need. I will just continue to check back until you return. You must return though because you are the reason that I cut my relaxer out so I need to see your hair to keep the faith that my will look like more than ass in a little while.
my god, i HATE when people say they have news but they can’t share it yet. just wait until you can, motherfucker, and then say it.
ps. there’s nothing worse than writing when you feel pressure or feel forced to write. write when you want to, love. we’ll all still be here to listen. HUGS.
What the hell are you doing? Pull yourself together and get on with it….enough dramma!
Uh, heart’cha. That is all. Come and go as you please. For the love of all that is holy, it’s your damned blog. And I forget or get too busy to write for weeks at a time (not that I am in any way saying I am good at ze blogging thing. I am not).
Feel better. Also, ignore the assholes.
1. Assholes suck, especially judgemental ones. Ignore them.
2. Own your shit. When you write, those who really appreciate it will be here to enjoy it.
3. Heal. From illness’ physical or otherwise.
Good vibes to you-
Melis
Um. Can we be in Supreme Asshole Club? Because I totally am with you on A, B, AND C.
Always put your needs fist. Those who truly love you, catch you when you fall, hold your hand, and love you
snot and all.
I don’t frequently comment because I am LAZY like that,
but I love this blog.
Hugs and prayers.
PS If anyone knows Barb tell her the word drama has one m-not two.
Heather B.-
Stoppin’ by to check on you honey. Hope all is well. You didn’t freeze in this NY weather, right? And if you landed in the Hudson on a plane you’re safe. You travel so much we could play “Where in the World is Heather B?”
Please note:
drama = drama
dramma = over the top drama
I assure you I know the difference.
Delurking to say: Take care of yourself. Get better! Drink some mint tea with a bit of honey.
This is just to let you know that I have returned to the face of the Earth, pal.