“Be careful of your thoughts; they may become words at any moment.” ~Ira Gassen
Usually I’m very meticulous about the stories I tell you all because they are all a manifestation of something I’ve been thinking long and hard about for days. Sadly with NaBloPoMo you’re getting a heap load of verbal diarrhea: Exactly what I’m thinking as I think it. It’s my brain in real time. Discussion of vanity plates and how my brothers leave me out of everything are exactly what’s going through my head. Not about the economy or the world’s most heinous project but vanity plates and high pitched whining.
Currently* I want to go off on a room full of educated white women discussing how black people think. It’s a discussion of race and gay marriage. And oh, oh, the burning. It hurts to hear a group of people discuss race and to want to just throw yourself into that conversation but you cannot because you’re so livid by the overall tone and accusations that have come up since the election day debacle that you cannot bring yourself to insert yourself without your head doing a 360 degree turn at the absurdity of it all. Instead I fumed and spouted off and stomped outside to be alone with my ever sober self then came back in to drown my sorrows in chèvre. And to do as my mother said; which is to blog about it and use incessant run-on sentences and possible non-sequiturs to say: Oh my hell, I’m pissed.
*This was last night. I’m fine now. Carry on.
6 Comments
I hear you. I have a hard time biting my tongue as well.
An aside: I’m super proud and honored to serve under Obama, and am thrilled for the black community for all the strides you’ve made for racial equality, etc. There just aren’t words to express all of that properly. But…Obama is half black and half white. So is it wrong for me to say that I’m just as proud we have a white man in office that I can get behind? Not to dimish the achievement or anything like that. But I’ve never believed in any white politicians either until now.
I am impressed. NoBloMo (or whatever) is far too daunting for me.
I see my mistake with NaBloPo. But I think NoBloPo is funnier.
The thing about NaBloPo is that it’s hard and then all of my content isn’t content as much as it is crap dredged up from the recesses of my brain. It’s like making every twitter a blog entry.
I love that you’re doing NaBloPoMo, because I so enjoy your recessed brain material.
And, speaking for educated, white women everywhere…we totally suck, and not in a good way.
I completely understand being so angry that you cannot speak in a particular situation, but it is unfortunate that you weren’t able to give those women another perspective. The Prop 8/black connection is something that is going around a lot, particularly here in Southern California. Whether or not there is truth to it, the idea is gaining traction.
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[...] Sometimes it’s easier to refer to someone as “the Jewish one” or “the gay one” or “the Catholic one” or “the heavier one” or “the black one.” It’s not because we’re all Anti-Semites, homophobes, aethiests, vain or a racist, sometimes it’s just easier to point someone out with an obvious difference. You all know you have that one Aunt you refer to as “The Crazy One.” Every family has one. I remember at BlogHer last year trying to tiptoe around the fact that Heather B. was black. So what? She is! And she refers to herself as such on her blog. [...]