If I’m not here…(Volume VI)

“It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument.”  ~William G. McAdoo

I need a break from humanity. The reasons for such will probably come off as snotty and sanctimonious, which is the same thing I have been attempting to eschew but Lord knows that I have no right in the world to act holier than thou especially with the offline behavior I’ve been portraying.  I’ve made mistakes that would make your skin crawl and I am often wrong and have just recently grasped the concept that if I dish it, then I have to be prepared to take it right back. So I installed a filter between my brain and my mouth and I try to tread a little more lightly and do some absorbing and thinking before opening my mouth. It’s not like I’ve amassed decades worth of wisdom in my head it’s just that I’ve gone and offended enough people only to collapse into a heap of lip quivering sobs and crocodile tears when torn a new asshole in retaliation. I feel like it’s basic common sense and yet there have been far too many occasions over the past few days that I’ve sent me recoiling in fear that there are actual people who behave in such a vile, skin crawling manner.

I always thought that when I became an adult and encountered other adults then things would be better. Birds would chirp. Skittles would fall from the sky and we would be able to have polite discourse on whatever topic without anyone losing their shit. I was wrong. So very wrong. I’ve lost my shit. Others have lost their shit. I’ve wanted to pull my hair out because the overwhelming breadth of idiocy in humanity makes me want to cry. And I’ve wanted to pull my hair out for not being understanding enough and for not putting my listening ears on. Everyone is at fault here.

We’re adults we should behave in such a manner at some point in time. Who cares about my quasi-utopian beliefs for achieving perfection and some ability to be civil by some arbitrary age. I want what I want, damn it!

Anyway, onward! Onward to my praise of the empire waist. Note the number of times that I use the word ‘pregnant’ in that post. I’m not pregnant and I would like to keep from looking pregnant so if you are going to wear empire waist dresses and the like, you shouldn’t look as if you’re concealing a pregnancy. What else, what else? Oh yes! Feminism and Palin and The Glass Ceiling from the younger generation. Basically we have a mixed bag, view of things. Look at that, another bit of ‘wisdom’: Things aren’t always black and white. Lots of gray matter there. And finally, I’d like for Bravo to not glamorize the life of those who are famous for knowing a famous person. If Ken Paves gets a show I’m throwing the plasma out the damn window.

This weekend calls for a mini-holiday. Specifically to this . So if you live in the Oklahoma City area you should come to purchase Sleep is for the Weak and to have Susan sign your copy. Let it be known that is only one of the two SIFTW signings I will be attending this fall (the second in DC at Vinoteca with the WINE BAR) . Because I am that kind of friend. The good kind who will support you and your writing endeavors even if it means using the $10 I could’ve spent on a glass of Sauvignon Blanc on a book about parenting. If that’s not love, then I don’t know what is. Anyway, come! It will be fun! I’ll be there and Susan will be there and we’ll both be standing around awkward as all hell and wishing that coffee was an IRISH coffee. hint, hint.