Dear Diary*
September 13, 2006 | Filed under: La Madre
*This is your brain. This is your brain on very little sleep.**
**No Pasa Nada: Like a 1987 crack commercial***
***No Pasa Nada: Just say no
“You’ve come this far and I’m still here. Don’t look back. Don’t turn around. Don’t be melancholy now” – JST
Dear Diary,
Today was a generally shitty day. In fact every day is a shitty day even though there’s no need to feel shitty. ‘Holy infatuation, Batman’ to boot.
Also there’s this whole mastectomy business that I still don’t know how I feel about. It’s a lot to process and once I’m done processing I’m sure I’ll be a little more eloquent than “this fucking sucks. Why doesn’t anything go well? Woe is me.”
And finally, this evening I lived my worst nightmare (which is relative given this whole breast cancer thing): See, this morning I went to work in heels because I had a cab take me so I didn’t have the usual flip flops. I had planned to go to the gym after work. When I got to the gym, I realized I didn’t have a shirt with me, but didn’t want to walk home in heels. So what did I have to do? I had to wear the horror or horrors: the dreaded a-line skirt with adidas and socks look that I’ve managed to avoid for the last 22 years and 10 months. Skirt and sneakers. I practically ran down the street. It could have only been worse if I had been wearing stockings.
So yeah, that was my day. Oh and then I got home and choked on a cracker. Seriously, it was pretty bad and scary. Then I played awkward conversation time with the roommate. Fun as always.
It feels like every time I take two steps forward, I take 47 steps back.
Here’s hoping that tomorrow is better.
HB
jonniker says:
Oh dear, I hope tomorrow is better, too. And choking IS scary! it is!
Much love, Heather.
maliavale says:
I’ll drink to that. Here’s to tomorrow!
LisaBinDaCity says:
Bless your heart.
I hope things are better now!
Oh and the adidas with skirt thing is popular in NYC. Ugly as all heck, but easier on the commute than Jimmy Choos.
sparkles anonymous! says:
I once did the walk of shame in gym shorts and heels.
Don’t ask.
As far as choking goes, once I started to choke on a piece of bread, and I jumped up from the table and RAN OUTSIDE, away from all of the 11 people at the table who could have administered the Heimlich or something. I still have no idea what instinct that was that took me over.
Wryter says:
Tomorrow’s always better. Even when it rains.
treespotter says:
most of the time, i’m feeling that if tomorrow’s better, tomorrow won’t blog.
Bone says:
Nice quote.
And next time, we’ll need a picture of the skirt and sneakers please
Jennifer says:
I walk to work too, and I just can’t do 3/4 mile in heels. Actually, I never wear heels, but I can’t do 3/4 mile in any nice shoes. So I rock the cute business outfit with sneakers 2 times a day, five days a week. Sometimes I still look at myself and think, “How did a waitress take over my body?” But in general, I’m over it… and my feet are much happier.
But then again, I was never that trendy to begin with.
Heather B. says:
Thanks y’all!
And that quote happens to be one of my favorites.
Tomorrow I shall post a picture of the bright green North Face raincoat, the a line skirt, and my adidas.
Namaste says:
47 steps back is not a bad thing at all. Just enjoy the view.
Hang in there!
wunelle says:
M&Ms, love. M&Ms.